Funny Facebook Statuses

Research shows that funny Facebook statuses are the ones that generally get the most positive reaction from readers. Being light-hearted and funny is definitely the way to win approval from large numbers of Facebook users, and funny Facebook statuses are the best way to go about it. For those who are not naturally funny, there are lots of Facebook statuses about funny things available here.

Please add only relevant and interesting statuses. If your total rating gets to low you won't be able to post again for some time.

Funny Facebook Statuses
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WTF! Im rubbing all the lamps in my house and not one genie has appeared. Thinking I need to go to Disney World and find Aladdin maybe they can tell me their secret
My "Give a Damn" broke and they are out of replacement parts!!
Who's smarter? Animals or humans? Answer: Which one goes down the dark basement stairs, with only a flashlight, asking "Is anyone there?'
I've go two chickens to paralyze, pack a bag of leaves tonight! (sang to the tune of Eddie Money's "two tickets to paradise".)
Honk if you leave peace and quiet.
Think big, think smart, think positive, think beautiful, think great. Now, I know this may be too much for you, so here is a shortcut. Just think about me!! :D
I don't mean to brag...but this mommy makes pretty babies!!
A bitch is a dog a dog has a bark bark is on a tree and a tree is part of nature and nature is beautiful so am i
'Bless your heart' is a redneck's way of saying your stupid
Funny Facebook Statuses
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I know how they say we need to come together as one but come on I'm squished in here
Life is not about the destination, but the journey! If your not enjoying the travel find a better destination!
Has Made a decision! And that alone should make you afraid :)
when life gets you know what you gotta do? just keep swimming, just keep swimming, swimming swimming swimming
I think my penis has stopped breathing.. Quick, I need you to do CPR on it.. Miss.. ASAP!!
Comment - answer below!!
is trying to behave


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