Funny Facebook Statuses

Research shows that funny Facebook statuses are the ones that generally get the most positive reaction from readers. Being light-hearted and funny is definitely the way to win approval from large numbers of Facebook users, and funny Facebook statuses are the best way to go about it. For those who are not naturally funny, there are lots of Facebook statuses about funny things available here.

Please add only relevant and interesting statuses. If your total rating gets to low you won't be able to post again for some time.

wants someone to wine to, but unfortunately wants to wine about every one they knows!
I try so hard to avoid stupid people. But somehow the weirdos still find me!
bought a racehorse the other day and called it 'My Face', might not be a winner but I cant wait to hear 10000 women shouting "Come On..My Face" on ladies day
I plan to be the richest person alive... I'm gonna accomplish this by finding the very elusive cure to Idiotitis. wish me luck!
.. was thinking about behaving themself tonight .. but figured fuck it .. where's the fun in that .. hehehehe ;)
Awww Damn It. My giveafuckometer is stuck on I don't again.
Go to Google Maps, search for directions from Japan to China and check out step 43. Gold!
Have you gone bonkers?! Of course you have, you're talking to me!! Lol :)
there's no such thing as crazy people; the correct term is mentally hilarious
I saw a massive wave on holiday in Hawaii.
says honey you know i prefer to walk lol
is installing a tip cup in place of my doorbell. "if you're going to stand there with the damn door open in the middle of winter you can pay the fuckin bill
has the cheekiest grin on their face...but is not sharing what they was thinking about! Do you wanna try and guess?
Life is like a card game, there are moments where you will scream bull shit!
Is everyone's alphabet soup spelling out naughty words or just mine?
Let me explain it again: 5 kids+different fathers+welfare= Not a good thing let me assure you. Nope not one bit of jealousy that's just common sense!
How many blond jokes are there? Only One! The rest of them are true! Want to know the only blond joke? This one. :P
did you ever wake up in the morning and want to smack someone for no current reason??


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