Funny Facebook Statuses

Research shows that funny Facebook statuses are the ones that generally get the most positive reaction from readers. Being light-hearted and funny is definitely the way to win approval from large numbers of Facebook users, and funny Facebook statuses are the best way to go about it. For those who are not naturally funny, there are lots of Facebook statuses about funny things available here.

Please add only relevant and interesting statuses. If your total rating gets to low you won't be able to post again for some time.



Funny Facebook Statuses
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Learn a lesson from your dog. No matter what life brings you, kick some grass over that crap and move on.
I'm in a relationship with sleep and i get some everynite... and if im lucky i get some during the day
She texted me: "your adorable." I replied: "no, YOU'RE adorable." Now she likes me, but all I did was point out her typo.
The little boy asked his father 'DAD how much does it cost to get married? Father replied 'I dont know son. Im still payimg
A perfect girl is not real, and a real girl is not perfect . :)
Did you ever wonder if camels looked down at their feet and say... Oh MY GOD I HAVE PUSSY FEET?
Men, we failed we just can never understand the woman's logic, so give up trying, nod your head, and say thank you for still loving us anyway
Cops don't like it when they tell you to put your hands up in the air then you wave them like you just don't care
For all you who think I'm not worth much, I'll have you know I have many great qualities or as my therapist calls them "symptoms".
Your arrival was fantastic, now let me see your departure!
Funny Facebook Statuses
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I wish I had somebody to blame all of my problems on, like my wife does.
Tonight... I'm drinking until I'm someone Else's problem!
Tips to reduce weight: turn your head to the right, now to the left... now repeat this procedure every time you're offered something to eat.
It's 10 degrees here today. I just keyed someone's car with my nipples.
Sarcasm is a body’s natural defense against stupid.
For a good healthy dose of insanity, when leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot, yelling 'Run for your lives! They're loose!'
FRIEND: Wanna hear a joke? , YOU: Your life?!
The work week is so long even the calendar says W T F

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