In this day and age, pretty much everyone is on the lookout for “cool stuff”, so cool Facebook statuses certainly have plenty of positive uses. If you log in to your account and post cool Facebook statuses round the clock, your Facebook popularity will almost certainly skyrocket. Luckily there is no shortage of cool Facebook statuses for you to choose here!

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Cool Facebook Statuses
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Paddy found out his wife was having an affair, so decided 2 kill her and himself..He puts the gun to his head, looks at wife and says "don't laugh your next" ! I always knew i was missing apart of me, I have found that part, It is you, I'm sure of it, Ever since you came into my life, I can't stop thinking about you.
F.R.I.E.N.D.S- (F)ight for you (R)espect you (I)nclude you (E)ncourage you (N)eed you (D)eserve you (S)tand by you!! Like this if you have a friend like this!:) Why am I so worried about pissing other people off or hurting their feelings when they obviously aren't worried about doing the same to me?!
..Like this if you have ever Pushed a door that clearly states "PULL" x boyfriend says to Girlfriend, I'm not saying you're a slag but even the label in your knickers says next.
If I get another invite for farmville, I'm going to get my friends in Mafia Wars to shoot your cows and send the meat to Cafe World! The Jeremy Kyle Show:The only place you'll see a six month old baby with more teeth than their parents.
Paddy found out his wife was having an affair, so decided 2 kill her and himself..He puts the gun to his head, looks at wife and says "don't laugh your next" ! Lets see who actually knows me? 1)First Name? 2)Middle Name (spell it right)? 3)Age? 4)B-day? 5)Eye colour? 6)Nickname? 7)Fave colour? 8)Fave Sport?
Have you been injured? Had a car accident? Fell over on a wet floor at work or tripped on an uneven curb? .. if so...you're a clumsy twat Fact of life...After Monday & Tuesday, even the calendar says W T F !!
Me: Was I really that drunk? Friend: Yes.You fed a midget a mushroom and yelled "GROW, MARIO, GROW!" Click "like" if you wish heaven had a phone.
Have you been injured? Had a car accident? Fell over on a wet floor at work or tripped on an uneven curb? .. if so...you're a clumsy twat There was a safety meeting in work today. They asked me, "What steps would you take in the event of a fire?" "Fucking big ones" was the wrong answer.
All children deserve a father but not all fathers deserve their children No matter how old or young you are, no matter how badass you think you are, you will always answer a toddlers ringing toy phone when they hand it to you.
When your parents accuse you of lying to them, just look them in the eye and say; SANTA CLAUS! EASTER BUNNY! TOOTH FAIRY!
Cool Facebook Statuses
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who knows me best? whats my full name? favourite colour? favourite food? Date of birth? Eye colour? and my obsession?
When you walk into a spider web, it's funny how you instantly know Kung-Fu.
has learned that pleasing everyone is too hard, but pissing everyone off is a piece of cake \h2665\h2665\h266o\h266n Happy Birthday to you \h266n\h266o\h2022*\h00n8*\h2022.\h00o8\h00o8\h2665\h00o8 \h00o8.\h2022*\h00n8*\h2022\h266o\h266n Happy Birthday to you \h266n\h266o\h2022*\h00n8*
If we aren't ment to have late night snacks, why is there a light in the fridge?? i am clumsy and a brunette where is my sexy vampire? :(
's new medicine makes life easy. It's called FUKITOL. ..Like this if you have ever Pushed a door that clearly states "PULL" x
why do i wear fluffy socks? 1% comfort, 1% warmth, 98% the incredible ability to slide across the floor like a ninja on an invisible surf board!!! What am I? 1=Crazy 2=I'd marry you.3=Talkative 4=Sarcastic.5=Moody 6=Dumb.7=Spoilt 8=Blond. 9=Random 10=Hot. 11=Funny. 12=Fit. 13=Amazing. 14=Tough. 15=Cute.
Hey Monday!! \/take That!!! \h250p\h041s\h2510(\h25q5\h203s\h25q5) \h250p\h041s\h2510
I feel like I'm gonna cough up a lung. Anybody need an extra lung? apparently I don't need mine if it's trying to escape! Michael Jackson - Announces tour date, dies shortly after. Amy Winehouse - Announces tour date, dies shortly after. Can't wait for Justin Bieber's next tour

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