In this day and age, pretty much everyone is on the lookout for “cool stuff”, so cool Facebook statuses certainly have plenty of positive uses. If you log in to your account and post cool Facebook statuses round the clock, your Facebook popularity will almost certainly skyrocket. Luckily there is no shortage of cool Facebook statuses for you to choose here!

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Cool Facebook Statuses
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Have you been injured? Had a car accident? Fell over on a wet floor at work or tripped on an uneven curb? .. if so...you're a clumsy twat I always knew i was missing apart of me, I have found that part, It is you, I'm sure of it, Ever since you came into my life, I can't stop thinking about you.
Shakin' My Shamrocks! ~"( o )Y( o )"~ says I've just renamed my wifi network to "Police Surveillance Van #02". That should keep the neighbours on their toes for a while
Next time you go on a roller coaster bring some spare bolts with you & tell the person in front of you, "Dude these came out of your seat!"
When somebody says "Expect the unexpected" slap them in the face and say " You didn't expect that did you." If you see me smiling it's cos I'm thinking of doing something evil or naughty. If you see me laughing it's cos I've already done it
I am having one of those weeks where your middle finger answers every question! Please don't get confused between my personality & my attitude. My personality is who I am & my attitude depends on who you are!
Bought some Sainsbury sausages yesterday,there's a picture of Jamie Oliver on the front, on the back it says "prick with fork" ..Cant argue with that!
If you like me press Like. If you think I'm crazy comment: CRAZY! If you think im loveable, put a kiss. If you think I'm random put a smiley face.
spider spider on the wall , you think your smart u no f*ck all , your on a wall that's just been plastered , now your stuck u silly b*stard It's definitely time for bed. Dwarf syndrome is setting in. I'm getting sleepy, grumpy and dopey. Goodnight all!
Let's make Mondays illegal. All in favour click "like". I know that the world wont end in 2012 because my yogurt expires in 2013 :D!
\h2665\h2665\h266o\h266n Happy Birthday to you \h266n\h266o\h2022*\h00n8*\h2022.\h00o8\h00o8\h2665\h00o8 \h00o8.\h2022*\h00n8*\h2022\h266o\h266n Happy Birthday to you \h266n\h266o\h2022*\h00n8* just got barred from B&Q, some twat in an orange apron came up to me and asked me if I wanted decking, lucky I got the first punch in!!!!
Cool Facebook Statuses
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Man says to wife: "What would u do if i won the lottery?" Wife says: "Take half and leave you." Man says: "GREAT! I've won a tenner, here's a fiver now fuck off have you ever noticed that when you click the favourite button it circles the v in it...go ahead and try it now =p
here's a riot in my biscuit tin. Rocky just hit Penguin with a club, tied her to a Wagon Wheel with a blue ribbon. AND the jammy dodger got away.
For those who keep sending me farm ville requests Please stop! I got banned because i was growing marijuana and selling it in Mafia Wars! Lets see who actually knows me? 1)First Name? 2)Middle Name (spell it right)? 3)Age? 4)B-day? 5)Eye colour? 6)Nickname? 7)Fave colour? 8)Fave Sport?
my mind doesn't just wander, it fucks off completely at times : ) Mum, I wish heaven had a phone, so I could hear your voice again. I wish heaven had stairs, so I could come and see you and hug you again. Love you always. Rip.
I may not be able to give my kids everything they want but I give them what they need. Love, time, and attention. You can't buy those things. Man says to wife: "What would u do if i won the lottery?" Wife says: "Take half and leave you." Man says: "GREAT! I've won a tenner, here's a fiver now fuck off
if you like me, poke me. If you miss me, like this post. If you love me, send me a secret message. If you hate me, comment and tell me why! Go Compareeee Go Compareeeee give me a bat to hit the tw** at Go Compare. :@
Oh My God I stood on a cornflake...so i guess I'm a cereal killer now
Mum, I wish heaven had a phone, so I could hear your voice again. I wish heaven had stairs, so I could come and see you and hug you again. Love you always. Rip. NO! I don't wanna go! You can't make me! Stomps feet, slams door... Alright fine! I'll go to work, but just so you know, I'm not happy about it!!!

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