Funny Facebook Statuses

Research shows that funny Facebook statuses are the ones that generally get the most positive reaction from readers. Being light-hearted and funny is definitely the way to win approval from large numbers of Facebook users, and funny Facebook statuses are the best way to go about it. For those who are not naturally funny, there are lots of Facebook statuses about funny things available here.
Funny Facebook Status On Chalkboard Background
Funny Facebook Status On Paper Background
You can get your favourite quotes as a cute picture for your timeline, just click one of the image icons under the facebook status that you like.
Know a nice status? Don't hesitate, add it, (please use English though):
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Why doesn't someone invent a clear toaster so you can see how toasted your toast is while it's toasting?
Funny
-1
I don't know why I don't buy more piñatas. Like right now I would love to beat the crap out of something and then eat a bunch of candy.
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0
A worm is a pretty disappointing prize for getting up early if you ask me.
Funny
0
The only thing worse than the one that got away is the one that won't go away.
Funny
0
How is it that one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box for me to start a campfire?
Funny
0
My new years resolution was to lose 30 pounds by the end of summer. I've only got 40 pounds to go.
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0
Dear Saturday, you and I have been friends for a long time. I wish you would come around more often. Once a week isn't enough.
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0
Without coffee, I'm just a really tall 2 year old.
Funny
-1
Dodgeball: America's twist on stoning
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0
The rest of the country calls it a "crime ring". In New England, it's called a "huddle".
Funny
-1
I watched my first silent movie the other day. The kids weren't there.
Funny
1
My kids keep bugging me about dinner even after I told them I already ate...
Funny
0
I Hate when Im making milkshakes and boys come to my yard.
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0
Worrying is like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do, but doesn’t get you anywhere.
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1
If there isn't a Chinese millionaire that's changed their name to Cha Ching, then I don't see the point of money.
Funny
-1
Oh you just put lotion on? You're not going anywhere. - Doorknob
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2
They should have cell phone chargers in waiting rooms instead of magazines.
Funny
3
A man was hospitalized with 6 plastic horses up his butt. The doctor described his condition as stable.
Funny
0
We add new interesting quotes to our site daily, so visit us frequently to find the most popular facebook status updates, sayings about relationships and friendship or some funny facebook statuses. Also please remember to vote for the ones you like, so that more people can see them. Thanks!