Funny Facebook Statuses

Research shows that funny Facebook statuses are the ones that generally get the most positive reaction from readers. Being light-hearted and funny is definitely the way to win approval from large numbers of Facebook users, and funny Facebook statuses are the best way to go about it. For those who are not naturally funny, there are lots of Facebook statuses about funny things available here.
Funny Facebook Status On Chalkboard Background
Funny Facebook Status On Paper Background
You can get your favourite quotes as a cute picture for your timeline, just click one of the image icons under the facebook status that you like.
Know a nice status? Don't hesitate, add it, (please use English though):
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The easiest way for me to lose inches is to switch to the metric system.
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This homeless guy asked me for money the other day and I was about to give it to him then I thought; he's just going to spend it on alcohol and drugs. Why should I give it to him? Then I realized that's what I'm gonna use it for. Who am I to judge this poor bastard?
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People die every year in vending machine accidents. How are we still at the top of the food chain?
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Periods are ridiculous. Females shouldn't be punished for not being pregnant.
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For every photo a girl posts of herself, there are 27 others in the exact same pose that weren't quite good enough.
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You know that look women get when they want sex ? Me neither...
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Here's a list of things I like:
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Worrying is like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do, but doesn’t get you anywhere.
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Hoe i will ✄ you
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Reading that California now has the Powerball. I'm confused. Hasn't Lance Armstrong lived here for years?
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OK, I'm not an advertising specialist but seriously McDonald's, what the hell were you thinking?!? Somebody asked me the other day if I'd tried a McDonald's McWrap. I said "Why would I eat something called McCrap?!?"
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If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of payments
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So what do women say when they're actually fine?
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I consider my body less of a temple and more of a ruin.
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Some consider Romeo and Juliet a tale of true romantic love. Sure, if you consider 2 underage kids in a relationship that lasted 3 days causing 2 suicides and 3 murders romantic.
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I got arrested for growing weed in my back yard, but I was framed. The evidence was planted.
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I watched my first silent movie the other day. The kids weren't there.
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I lost a very close friend and drinking partner last week. He got his finger caught in a wedding ring.
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We add new interesting quotes to our site daily, so visit us frequently to find the most popular facebook status updates, sayings about relationships and friendship or some funny facebook statuses. Also please remember to vote for the ones you like, so that more people can see them. Thanks!