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Men, we failed we just can never understand the woman's logic, so give up trying, nod your head, and say thank you for still loving us anyway
When someone says they have to ask you a question, you think of all the bad things you've done recently.
A baby just smiled at me and now I want... Nope, it's crying now. Nope.
( • ) ( • ) You pervs! Those are nice owl eyes, huh?
I hate it when someone turns the lights on while I`m asleep and I`m all like (o__-)
The best memories come from bad ideas.
Waking up to unread texts
I can't take this long distance relationship anymore... Fridge, you're coming to my room
While wearing a bikini you show 90% of your body, but men are so polite, that they stare only at the covered places.
I'm actually really nice, until you annoy me.
It's 10 degrees here today. I just keyed someone's car with my nipples.
I listen to music everyday, no matter what mood I'm in.
Have you ever noticed that it's impossible to make pinching your elbow hurt?
Anyone else sit on the toilet and play with their phone until you realized you have been finished 10 minutes ago?
When I say '' It's a long story'' It usually means I just dont want to tell you it.
female. Fe = Iron; Male = Man. Therefore, You're Iron Man.
Say this out loud fast: ''U R 2 6 C I 1 2 4 Q.''
I'm actually not funny. I'm just really mean and people think I'm joking.