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As a nation, we may be spending our children's money, but at my house, it's the other way around.
Funny
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I wish I budgeted with my whole paycheck as well as I do with the last fifty bucks of it.
Funny
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I love you. I love you not because you're adorable or because you're sweet, or because you're my best friend. I love you because you make me step outside myself & look at who I really am. You make me want to be a better person, just because you are who you are. I can tell you absolutely everything, & I know you will listen. And you're one of my best friends, but I'll keep all of this to myself because I love you & because you don't feel the same way. I wish that I could make you love me, but I can't. That's why these words will be forever lost in my memories & never to be spoken aloud. I love you.
Best Friends
1
Apparently I misunderstood it when I was told to "expose yourself to other cultures."
Funny
0
Life is a marathon. That's why I'm carb loading.
Funny
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Freedom begins, When you get out of the cage you built. Forgiveness & acceptance isn't given just to others. It is something you have to give yourself.
Bitch
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don't cry for what could have been....smile cause of what you shared.
Death
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I could be a morning person if morning happened after 11.
Funny
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This bald spot just appeared out of thin hair.
Funny
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As a child my family's menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it.
Funny
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Hwy You DO u know ur a Fucking tity stalker
Bitchy
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It’s not really drinking alone if the dog is home.
Funny
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Black Friday is starting to turn into Black Thursday...
Funny
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I got in touch with my inner self today. That's the last time I ever buy cheap toilet paper!
Funny
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A wife is like a hand grenade. Remove the ring, and your house is gone.
Funny
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Tattoo artists should have built-in spell check.
Funny
2
mengpa oh mengapa
Animals
0
I don't know why I'm disappointed when I find out a celebrity crush is married. As if that was our only obstacle to being together.
Funny
0
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