You can get your favourite quotes as a cute picture for your timeline, just click one of the image icons under the facebook status that you like.
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At the Taco Bell drive through, the cashier asked me if I wanted to donate a dollar to "Help World Hunger", Is it just me...Or should the word STOP be in there?
I'm gonna name my son Wussell so people think he has a speech impediment.
Thank God I was young and stupid BEFORE there were camera phones.
alone? better than stay with fake people
this site need a top 20 list!
My wallet is like a onion. When I open it, it makes me cry.
couples who smoke together
I don’t want to be a millionaire, I just want enough money to be able to stare off into the distance while pumping gas.
Eating 4 cans of alphabet soup will give you a giant vowel movement.
Would you prefer McDreamy or McSteamy?
Don't worry. Your secret is safe with me. I wasn't listening anyway.
Going to Target. See you in about two hundred bucks...
Friday: My second favorite F word.
School taught me a lot of stuff, but the most useful was how to get ready in 15 minutes